Death of Dreams
by emeralddusk
Summary: It didn't take much for it all to be destroyed.
1. Summer's Toll

_Carly Shay-Spencer Shay, Sam Puckett, Freddie Benson_

_Tori Vega- Katrina Vega, Cat Valentine, Jade West, Beck Oliver_

_Zoey Brooks-Lola Martinez, Quinn Pensky, Dana Cruz_

**Death of Dreams**

Chapter One; Summer's Toll

Carly Shay was, all things considered, a normal sixteen-year-old girl. Since her mother passed away, and her father was stationed overseas in the Navy, the teenager was put in the loving custody of her older brother, Spencer Shay. Everyone who knew Carly knew she was loving, caring to a fault, forgiving, loyal, and a perfect role model. Freddie Benson, a fifteen-year-old, only child of single mother, Matilda Benson, noticed the girl's kindness early on. Naturally, he dumped Princess Laya and Arcee, and took to Carly instead. Freddie was shy, tech-savvy, nice, easy-going in most cases, and never one to start a fight. While the boy didn't come into Carly's life until eighth grade, her best friend of equal age, Sam Puckett, had been there since kindergarten; the two were inseparable. Despite this, the girls were polar opposites; Sam was rude, crude, brash, quick to anger and violence, and not very into education (though her street smarts and common sense seemed to more than make up for it). Like Carly, though, the blond girl had an endless capacity to care about her friends, forgive their flaws, and make things a little bit better for them. Sam was Carly's rock.

While the two girls took to one another quickly, Freddie and Sam were another story; Sam never liked the boy, viewed him as a nerd, and was highly annoyed by his attraction to Carly. Who wouldn't be? Puppy dog love is only cute when someone else has to deal with it. Freddie tried to become friends with Ms. Puckett, but turned cold to her when she grew vicious. Over the years, though, hatred and insults became a part of the boy and girl's lives, and they became friends.

Spencer, unlike Carly, had very few friends on his side, had strange tendencies, and had no social life. Socko and Juline were considered by many to be the young man's only friends. It didn't matter, though; quality beats quantity every time. Dating? Not really a factor. Ever since Spencer dropped out of law school, he left his romantic side to die alone (as it deserved). Painting and sculpting were the only things the boy was in love with. Being a father figure at 22 was difficult, but rewarding in so many ways. Sam and Freddie often took the young adult as the adult in their own lives.

Sam's mother, Pam, was an alcoholic who didn't shy from physical and verbal abuse. Melanie, Sam's identical twin sister, managed to get away from her nightmarish home by enrolling in a boarding school overseas. The two sisters all too easily fell out of contact (thanks to Sam), and haven't spoken for three years. While some kids took their abuse, wrote books and burned them, or ran away, Sam chose to stay in the evil home she took comfort and security in, but decided to stand up for herself; Sam wasn't the only Puckett with bruises on her body...or she'd like to think. No one knew when or why the girl changed as she entered her teens, but the sweet, innocent girl she once was had died. Maturity came early, and took its toll on the teenager's mind, making her cold and ruthless; like the world around her...or she'd like to think.

Freddie, on the other hand, had a seemingly perfect life; loving mother, good amount of money and free time, dedication to school, friends, and self-confidence. However, Matilda's over-protective nature became smothering; no girlfriends, no violent movies, no junk food, no violent or scary video games or books, no "gang" clothing or colors, and no mention of alcohol, sex, or drugs (they were evil. End of story). Being a child, Freddie never questioned these rules. As a teen, though, he grew curious; smoking was blatant stupidity, alcohol sounded disgusting, drugs were terrifying, sex, though... was something else. What was it? What was it supposed to be? Why did everyone make such a big deal over it?

When the girls became juniors and Freddie became a sophomore, they started their own web show. They had the equipment, plenty of free time and ideas; why not? The boy voted on calling the show iCarly, and was the one who put the sketches on YouTube. Sam and Carly were the stars. They were wacky, zany, hilarious, and cute. Reviews were almost always positive; "You girls are the next Amanda!", "We love you!", "NEVER GROW UP!" Freddie didn't mind being the faceless cameraman and uncredited co-creator, even though Carly tried to get him to come on camera a few times.

"In 5...4...3...2..." Freddie counted down, aiming a tripod at Sam and Carly. The electronic eye view through the lens turned to static, then clarified.

"Okay, my name is Victoria Vega...junior," a tall, thin girl with long, straight, light-brown hair said, her tone nice and modest. "But everyone calls me Tori. I've been a student at Hollywood Arts for four years. Um, I'm eighteen right now. My talents are singing, dancing, and amateur acting."

"Ever do any modeling?" asked the cameraman.

"That's not really my thing," the teenager politely answered. "I like people to like me because of my talent...not my body."

"My name is Katrina," said a teenage girl who looked somewhat like Tori, but a little chubby and with darker, shorter hair. "I'm the older of the Vega sisters...being nineteen. My talents are singing, dancing, acting, and modeling if you want."

"Do you have a boyfriend right now?" asked the cameraman.

"No, never," Katrina answered, not showing any discomfort or shame. "Not enough time. My career's more important. I want to be on Broadway by the time I'm twenty."

"What's your main goal?" asked the man behind the camera.

"My dream is to see my name in lights," the girl answered, her tone deepening. "I want everyone to know my name...to know me."

"Why?" asked the man, not showing definite emotion or purpose. The girl sat still, trying to articulate her feelings and thoughts.

"I'm Catarina Valentine," introduced a girl with long shining red-velvet hair. "I'm sixteen. I love dancing. I'm also really into singing. Acting's cool too, but really just the first two things...are what I'm interested in." The man zoomed in closer to the girl's face. "Hey, I think there's a butterfly on the window. I love butterflies. They're like paintings that can fly. Do you ever get that? I love them." Cat put a smile on her face, and thought about the colorful insects flying so free in the air.

"Name?" asked the cameraman, showing as much ambition as the girl he was interviewing.

"Jade...West," the dark-haired girl with Gothic makeup and streaks of pink and dark blue in her long bangs. Her tone was grave and angry. "I'm a singer and an actress. I'm seventeen...Need anything else?"

"Nope," the cameraman answered, showing no emotion.

"My name's Beck Oliver," a boy with long but well-kept black hair said, staring into the camera like a natural. "I'm Jade's boyfriend...I'm eighteen. Um, I'm studying to be an actor. I also do a little dancing. Acting is something I'm really passionate about, though. My first inspiration was the voice actor, Frank Welker; he was so talented, so diverse in his works. That's who I want to be."

"Thank you," the man replied. Shutting off his cam quarter, the man saw static block out his sight.

"Next!"

"Zoey Brooks," a woman with short brown hair and thick, round-rimmed glasses called. "Senior. Has attended PCA since freshman year. Roommates with Lola Martinez and Dana Cruz. Nothing on her record...Honor Roll every year. She sounds stable and committed."

"Martinez?" the man sitting in a chair asked. "She related to Dylan Martinez?" Instantly, the overweight, balding man thought of the infamous drug-addict living in New York and living off stocks.

"Her father," the woman answered. "She seems nothing like him, though."

Sitting in a waiting room outside the dean's office, awaiting the results of their enrollment tests for college, a blond girl, a dark brunette with her hair parted in the middle and wearing pink glasses, a shining brown, curly-haired girl with a mature face, and a thin girl with pink streaks in her black hair felt their hearts pound.

"I'm really nervous," the blond confessed, her stomach turned to its side.

"You'll do fine, Zoey," Quinn, the girl with glasses, replied. "I'm kind of tore up, though."

"Why?" Dana, the mature-faced girl shot back, her tone cold. "Because you can't attend four schools at once?"

"Knock it off," Lola snarled. "Why do you have to act like such a wench?"

Dana sat back, a cross look on her face. Fighting would be stupid in a place like this. As always, the girl let her anger fester in her stomach. Lola was always there for Quinn, like an older sister, not that she needed her. To everyone, Lola seemed nice but pompous, smart but incapable of being respected due to her weird and constant acting habits, and mysterious.

"This has to go well," Zoey said, grabbing her left arm with her right hand. "College means everything to me." As everyone was expected to know, college meant a good future. The future was all that mattered.

The day was proceeding under a bright blue sky; the sun was hot but comforting. Lightly, a tepid breeze flowed through Seattle, rustling the leaves covering the different kinds of trees. As always, the Space Needle reflected the rays of the sun in an unearthly style. Carly walked down the sidewalk, having returned from a movie. Unfortunately, Sam was busy with something and hadn't been answering her phone. "I wonder where she is," Carly said to herself, feeling the wind blow her long brown hair. "Sam never passes up free movies...especially when there's food other people pay for."

Meanwhile, Sam was laying in her bedroom, her head against the small dresser by her bed. The shades were closed, letting in only faint streaks of light. Her body coated in sweat, the girl took deep breaths in and out, her eyes closed. Too many days had been spent like this, but what did it really matter? It felt so good at the time. Feeling emotionally light, Sam put a big smile on her face, then rolled up, feeling chilled. "Oh boy," she whispered. Not that long ago, the saw the graphic images of what she'd done to herself; taken the bag from under her bed, poured a generous pile of crystallized ecstasy onto her palm, stuck a rolled up piece of paper in her right nostril, and snorted heavily. _Her nasal cavity burned; her pupils dilated; she took in a deep, seduced breath; watched her environment change around her-colors sharpening; her attitude shifting._ "Oh, crap," Sam happily moaned, leaning back against her wall.

Images of Pam faded from the teenager's mind; everything was good, or at least different. _Can't wait for that big high to set in, _Sam thought, her heart pounding. Before she noticed it, her teeth were gnashing together, not that she cared.

In the distant background, Sam could hear a ringing sound. It was kind of pretty. "Hello," the delusional teenager said, trying to hold back her laughter. The ringing of her cell phone persisted as Carly attempted to make contact. Feeling deep relief from nothing in particular, Sam ran her hands through the back of her hair, then threw them in the air, letting her long locks fall back into place as she lightly giggled.

"What's going on with her?" Carly asked herself, looking down at her cell phone. Accepting her failure, the girl walked back to her apartment building.

"Quinn!" Zoey cried, running into her dorm room, her voice bursting with happiness. "Quinn, where are you?"

"Just got out of the shower," the dark-haired girl answered, walking in to the room wrapped in a towel, her hair still wet and lightly tasseled at the sides. "What's up?"

"I got the results back from my test!" Zoey shrieked, overcome with joy. "I'm in! All I need to do is pass an interview."

"That's great!" Quinn replied, sharing her friend's ambition. "Way to go!"

"Thanks!" Zoey replied, not able to keep a smile off her face. "...Hey...You know...you look pretty without your glasses on."

Quinn stood still, not knowing how to perceive the comment she'd been given.

Dana sat under a tree on campus, watching the sun glow over the ocean. The light breeze coursed through her hair, causing her more tension and a feeling of violation. _I can't believe how pissed off that girl makes me, _she snarled in her mind, which felt like it was closing in on her. _She always has to attack me for every stupid thing I do. What the hell does she even get from that, anyway?_ Dana's breath grew heavy as her anger boiled in the back of her neck. It was so intense, so disgusting; she had to get all this hatred out of her system. At first, the impulse of punching a tree or slashing her arm came to mind, but neither of those seemed all that appealing. What felt like a dark cloud blew overhead, providing the Gothic relief Dana needed to douse out her rage. The wind grew colder, and she took it all in. _I hate her! _Not even in this atmosphere did the anger go away.

Tori walked down the hallway of Hollywood Arts, not worried about the way her hair bounced, the way her clothes looked, or how little makeup she wore. Above all, she felt good about herself; her real self. Tori was one of, if not _the_ thinnest girl at her school, and she got that way without even trying. She'd never brag; she was too sweet to do that, or even notice that about herself. Everyone knew she would be the one to succeed in everything she did.

"Hey, Tori," called Cat, running to her friend's side.

"Hi, Cat," Tori replied, happy as always. "What's up?"

"Did you hear the announcement?" asked the red-head, her voice loving and optimistic. "You're one of the favored finalists!"

"Oh my gosh!" Tori yelled, her throat barely prepared for the ambition she'd released. "Seriously?"

"Yeah!" Cat answered, jumping up once. "They want you to talk to some guy named Daniel after school!"

"Awesome!" Tori shot back, exploding with optimism. "Thank you, Cat! If I get famous, you're coming with me!"

"Ah, thanks, Tori," Cat replied, deeply touched.

Watching from a distance, Jade heard every word. Jealousy bubbled in her throat; she was better than Tori, wanted it more than Tori. She wasn't even one of the finalists. She deserved it! _I don't believe this, _she snarled.

"Hey, baby," Beck warmly greeted, putting his muscular arm around his girlfriend's shoulder. "I made the finals. Can I expect you to be there with me?"

"I don't think so," Jade snarled. "Didn't make it."

"Oh, baby, I'm sorry," Beck replied, his happy tone sinking. "I'll stay behind if you want." Deeply, secretly, the boy hoped Jade would refuse his offer, and encourage him to go on; freeing him from all regret.

"I don't," Jade coldly, hoarsely answered. "There's no reason you should screw up your future for me. Go. Be good." The girl kissed her lover on his lips, lightly staining them with her dark lipstick. "Love you." With that, Jade departed, still bitter.

Shocked and stricken with guilt, Beck stood still, debating his decision. It was horrible for Jade to be suffering like this, but what could he do? What good would blowing his dream do, either? Hopefully, she'd be okay soon. _Sorry, baby, _Beck thought to himself, questioning how sorry he really sounded and felt.

"Hey, Trina," Andre', an African-American teenage boy who Katrina knew since seventh grade, called. "Heard you made it. Congrats!"

"Thanks," Trina replied, not really looking away from her locker. "I knew I'd make it."

"And you're modest too," Andre' sarcastically retorted.

"No, it's just..." the brunette began. "I worked and trained really hard for this. It's not about the judges. It's about talent and ambition. Thanks, though."

Back in Seattle, Spencer gently stroked his canvas with his paint brush, dying a streak of it red. Painting was always a deep pleasure; maybe because his mother used to share the experience with him. Painting was peaceful, passionate, and always enjoyable. Carly had gone back up to her room to take a nap, so Spencer had the house to himself. While he loved being a brother and father figure, solitude was nice at times. _Almost...flawless, _the boy told himself, struggling to keep up his consistent perfection with every stroke. The nerves and intensity caused his hand to shake, but that wouldn't stop his purpose. However, the dedication didn't last; things were downhill, and the joy of working didn't last. Suddenly, the young man dropped his brush, sat on the couch, and turned on useless sitcoms to occupy himself without giving himself.

"Yo, Spence," called a familiar voice. "Spence, open up!"

"Come in, Socko, it's open," Spencer called back, not getting off the couch.

The door opened, and a boy about Spencer's age with long, dark hair walked in. "You really should start locking your doors. Look, I got some more of the good stuff. Feel like it?"

"Fine," Spencer answered, feeling down and aggravated with himself. "Got nothin' else to do."

The two walked into the kitchen, took out two metal spoons, poured cocaine onto their smooth, curved surfaces, then pulled out lighters. Slowly, the substance melted into a gel form.

"Gimme a needle," Spencer said, his tone just above a whisper. Socko handed the young man one of his needles, which he tried to keep track of. "Thanks, man." Sticking the silver point into the delicious fluid, Spencer watched it pour into the clear container; slowly, its surface rose, shrinking off the spoon. Their hearts starting to race, the boys pressed the needles into their arms, slid the thin metal through their flesh, which gave a slight sting, then pushed down on the black handle. Slowly, the liquid drained into their blood streams. _Their pupils dilated; their minds focused on their surroundings; each breath grew short. The cocaine swan through their veins, licking the sensors of their brains; changing the path of their dopamine._

"Whoa," Spencer said, sitting back into the cushions on his couch.

"I know," Sock replied, his tone growing more upbeat. "I feel awesome." It was easy to see the boy was getting overly-excited.

"Try to keep it down, though," Spencer said. "The kid's asleep." The two started laughing, knowing they should be quiet making it all the harder to stop.

Some time went by, and the mood changed; the two grew anxious, and Socko kept watching his back. To cope with this annoyance, Spencer started squeazing a stress ball repeatedly. "Man," he said. "Crack really gets me pissed! We gotta do something else."

"I don't know," Socko replied. "This is a pretty safe set-up. Should we risk it?"

"You wanna keep feeling like this?" Spencer snapped. "We'll just ask around. It'll be fine."

Carly sat on her bed, watching the sunset over the horizon. Once again, she tried to call her friend. "Sam, please pick up," she said. "I've been trying to talk to you all day."

Finally, Sam's voice replied. "Hey," she said. "What's up?"

"Where have you been?" Carly asked, obviously aggravated.

"Sorry, I was busy," the blond answered, covered under her warm sheets with a cool, wet wash cloth on her forehead. "Why? What's up?"

"I just wanted to talk to you," Carly answered. "You never pass up movies."

"Sorry, Carls," Sam replied, growing depressed. "You wanna do something tomorrow?"

"Okay," the brunette answered, feeling guilty about being angry. "Wanna go to the pier? That's always fun."

"Sure," Sam happily agreed. "Sounds great. See you then."

"See yuh," Carly happily said. "Bye," Sam cheerily said before hanging up.

"You need to calm down, Quinn," Lola said, gently stroking the girl's hair as they sat on the Puerto Rican girl's bed. "I'm sure you did a great job. You're a genius."

"Thanks, Lola," Quinn weakly replied, trying to hold back tears. "Oh, I feel like I'm gonna be sick."

"Just relax," Lola gently comforted her friend. "You're fine." Quinn layed down on the bed, and stared out at the sunset over the ocean.


	2. Fall

Death of Dreams

Chapter Two: Fall

The air was cool and uninviting when Fall overcame the world. Hollywood Arts was suffering with the devastating effects of the season. Tori sat by her locker, her mind racing; she could never forget what Daniel told her, what every one of his words sounded like...

"You're amazing," the young man told her. "One of the most talented artists I've ever seen..." His voice grew warmer, more tender. "And so beautiful," he added, leaning somewhat closer to Tori. "You'd be a perfect model."

"Um, thanks but I don't really like that kind of thing," Tori humbly replied, trying not to offend the man.

"Well, how old are you?" Daniel asked.

"Eighteen," the girl answered, growing confused. "Why?"

"Just insurance," the man responded. "If you want to work with me, I mean."

"Well, yeah," Tori quickly replied. "I'd love to. I mean, you seem like a nice man, and you really seem to know what you're doing, and I..." It was clear that the girl was excited; who wouldn't be? Anyone at Hollywood Arts was up most of the nights dreaming about a moment like this.

"You could be a star," Daniel declared. "All you'd have to do is pose for some pictures. It's that easy. I won't do anything you're not comfortable with."

"...Okay," the brunette replied, feeling a new sense of comfort. "Um, like, what kind of pictures do you want?"

"Have you ever thought about taking off your clothes for a show?" the man asked, his tone solid and caring.

"...W-what?" Tori asked, desperately hoping Daniel was kidding; that he could turn out to be someone she could trust. This was wrong; _What would my parents think about this? _she asked herself.

"It wouldn't be anything sexual," the young man promised. "You'd be treated with respect...Not like those Playboy models or porn stars. It would be a very safe environment."

"I-I don't think so," Victoria responded, her stomach growing upset. "I'm really sorry." The teenager stood up, wearing a sad look on her face. "I'm so sorry," she whispered, feeling her throat throb and hot tears stain her eyes. With that, the girl ran out of the room, shutting the door hard behind her. _My only chance, _she told cried in her mind. _And I just blew it. But what could I do? That stuff is wrong._

Zoey sat on her bed, looking over some books. The interview was in about one month, but she was sick over it already. Growing tense, Zoey ran her hand through her blond hair, clenching it tightly as her eyes focused on the text in front of her. An hour had gone by, and she felt worse than when she started.

"I can't believe I made it," Quinn told Lola, giving her a hug. "This is awesome! I'm getting closer to my dream job as a scientist."

"I'm so happy for you," Lola replied, her eyes focused on the wall behind Quinn. "You've worked so hard at this."

Dana sat in the corner of the room, clenching her left arm. Unlike the others, she'd failed her exam, but wasn't willing to share her feelings, or even the fact that it happened. It's not like she wasn't viewed as an idiot already. Closing her jaw in tighter, Dana began to clench her teeth until they hurt. "I'm going out," she finally said, her voice laced with fury as she headed out the door.

Lola looked for a brief second, then turned back to her friend. Outside, the sky was gray and the wind was cool. A gentle mist poured down onto the land.

Walking down the sidewalk, her arms crossed over her chest if only for warmth, Dana felt the icy water douse her face and hair. _I don't freakin' believe this, _she snarled in her mind, feeling her stomach fester with anxiety. _Those stupid tramps all made it, and I'm gonna be stuck in state school for the rest of my life. _Remembering her close friendship with Zoey, the girl began to feel guilty about her feelings; her anger grew more intense knowing she couldn't pursue her emotions. Finally, she reached an empty spot covered with grass and guarded by a tree. Looking around, Dana saw no one, and pulled out a small cigarette she'd made. Setting the end ablaze, the teenage girl felt her pulse spike. Taking a deep inhale, things changed. _Her brain burned with white-hot intensity; her pupils dilated; her body turned weak. _Her painful feelings fading, Dana slouched down under the tree, wearing a stupid smile on her young face; everything bad went away, if only for a minute.

It started to get extremely hot, and the girl could feel her teeth grinding. Reaching into her purse, Dana found a wash cloth, and stuck it into her mouth. If anyone asked, she'd say she lost a tooth and was trying to stop the bleeding. Sitting back as the rain blew and poured down, the shining-haired girl found herself at peace, her hand wrapped around her tummy for added security.

"Sam," Carly called, knocking on her friend's door. "Sam, can I come in?"

"Sure, it's open," the blond called back, staring at her bed and hoping her treasure would be safe. The brunette walked in, wearing her normal innocent smile. "What's up, Carls?"

"I just wanted to know if you felt like hanging out," Carly answered, her voice sweet.

"Sure," Sam replied, optimistic. "What do you wanna do?"

"How about we just talk," the brunette girl suggested. "We haven't done that in awhile."

"Cool," Sam agreed, crossing her legs on her bed. "Hey, did you see that stupid hair cut Fredbag got? You think his mom gave him that?"

Carly giggled, feeling guilty under her skin about laughing at her friend. "Yeah, and what's with that..." catching a strange smell in the air, the girl started looking around the room. "Do you smell that?"

"Smell what?" Sam asked, her tone lacking any emotion. "I think something might've died in the corner."

"No, it smells like..." Carly continued, trying to fathom the odor in her nostrils. "Almost like...um, I don't really know." Sam began to feel guilty; Carly was her friend, and she was hoarding her things right under her nose.

"Carly, wait a minute," the blond finally said. "Um, I have a pretty big secret...I need you to swear you won't tell anyone."

"Sure, Sam," Carly assured her friend. "What is it?"

The teenager jumped off her bed, reached under it, and pulled out a brown paper bag. Opening up the sack of ecstasy, Sam took a quick, rewarding smell of the powder, then showed it to Carly. "Check it out," she said, her emotions twisting in her mind.

"Oh my gosh," Carly exclaimed, her voice reduced to a shocked whisper. "Sam, that's heroin!"

"No, it's ecstasy," Sam corrected her friend, sounding somewhat annoyed. "Look, it's not a big deal. It's just something I do. You're my friend, and I've been keeping this from you for years. I'm really sorry."

"Sam, you need to get help," the brunette pleaded, growing frantic, though she couldn't even fathom that the situation was really happening; these kind of things didn't happen, not around here; not to people like Sam. "This is illegal...Why would you even do this to yourself?"

"Well, my mom's a bitch, I live in a dump," Sam angrily shot back. "I'm fat, nobody gives a crap about me. Why wouldn't I do this?" The blond pressed the bag around her nose, and started to snort the entire pile of white dust.

"Sam!" Carly shrieked, trying to smack the bag out of the girl's hands. "Stop it!" Finally, the blond surrendered, and set down the bag. "I'm sorry... You're not fat...I care about you. Your mom...that's not your fault."

"Still gotta live with it, though," Sam quickly responded, wiping off her raw nose. "And I am so sick of being told I'm useless. This is my way of dealing with it. I could be cutting myself or hurting people. But I don't do that, do I?"

"Don't get hostile," Carly shot back, feeling her throat start to hurt. "I just wanna help you."

"I don't need help," Sam replied, trying desperately to get her point across. "I like this. It's fun. No one forced me into doing this...Look, why don't you try it? It's not scary or anything."

"No," the brunette nervously replied, not wanting to offend her friend, but not daring to accept the lethal offer. "I-I don't do that kind of stuff."

"Okay," Sam agreed, starting to put her drugs under her bed. "Just thought it'd bring us a little closer. But that's fine. It's not for everybody...So, you wanna catch a movie or something?"

"Don't you wanna talk more about this?" Carly persisted, growing upset by her friend's lack of concern for what was going on. "This is serious."

"Not really," the blond replied, laying her head down on her pillow. "I'm just bored."

Not able to forget the issue, Carly began to pound it through her mind. "...What's it like?" she asked, sounding almost defeated. "When you're high?"

Sam sat up a little. "It's cool," she said, not seeming to really care. "Feels awesome. It's like...you get to stop thinking about everything, and just... have fun. It's not like you start robbing banks or killing people. Are you sure you don't wanna try it? You can stop whenever it gets old."

"Just a little," Carly accepted, feeling like she owed it to her friend. "How long does it last?"

"Not long," Sam answered. "All things considered. Take it slow your first few times. It's really a shock." The girl handed her friend the bag, and opened it in front of her. "Just take a pinch. You don't need much when you're starting. Go on."

Peer pressure; some creepy guys in an alley offering you candy and drugs? Not this time. Sam was Carly's best friend, and she really seemed to know what she was talking about. She'd never hurt her, and both the girls knew it. Carly poured a small pile of ecstasy on her palm, and spread it out a little too much.

Sam giggled at her friend's mistake, but wasn't trying to condescend. Carly looked at Sam and giggled a little. Finally, she pressed her nose into the pile, letting it tickle her face. Taking a deep breath in through her nostrils, the girl felt the powder flow up into her nasal cavity, causing them to burn; like when you get water up your nose in a public pool. "Ow, ow, ow!" Carly shrieked, feeling the pain get worse. "This really hurts! It's not stopping."

"Just relax," the blond assured her friend. "Just pinch it shut." Carly listened, and felt the pain fade a little bit. "Now just wait. It takes a few minutes some times."

"This is stupid," Carly replied, her voice sounding nasally due to her still holding her nose. "...Whoa." _Carly's skin erupted with tiny bumps, giving her an all-over chill; her pupils shrank quickly and she took in an intoxicated breath; Things began to change all around her. _"Oh, crap," she laughed, feeling her emotions lighten. "Damn, this stuff is awesome!" The two giggled. Sam then took a gulp of the drug, and started to feel like her friend. Slowly, the girls dropped back against the bed, feeling like everything was funny. Of course, Carly was kind of out-of-control, but Pam was passed out on the couch, so it didn't really matter.

_The two ran around the room, adjusting and taking down posters on the wall. "Hey, lemmefixyourhair," Sam's voice echoed as she ran her fingers through her friend's long, flawless brown hair. The girl giggled, and ran her hand down her long locks. "Yourbed'samess," Carly's vocals gently coursed through the air as she began pulling sheets and blankets off the blond's bed. The two kept running around, or walking, noticing everything around them._

Carly opened her eyes, waking up out of the funk she'd been in. "Whoa," she whispered, trying to sit up. "That was crazy." Soon, the teenager noticed her shirt was on backwards, and half her hair was braided. "What the heck happened?"

"Beats me," Sam moaned, not getting off the ground. "I'm really hot, though. You have any water?"

"I don't think so," Carly answered, half-dazed. "Sorry, I think I have to go."

"See yuh," Sam replied, not feeling like company anymore. "Lemme know if you wanna talk later."

The brunette moaned in agreement, then hit her shoulder on the door frame before leaving. Sam lay back down on her bed, burying her face under her pillow.

"Where have you been?" Zoey asked, seeing Dana in the mirror.

"Out," the girl answered. "What do you care?" Unlike earlier, the teenager was in no mood to be upbeat.

"I didn't know what happened to you," the blond answered. "Hey, how'd you do on those exams? I don't think you ever told me."

Dana spit, then sat on her bed, picking up a book.

"Are you gonna answer me?" Zoey persisted, getting sick of her roommate's rudeness.

"Don't count on it," the curly-haired girl responded. "Look, just leave me alone right now. I'm really pissed off, and don't feel like talking."

Knowing she was helpless in the fight, Zoey just went back to her studying. Maybe all these books would help her pass her interview.

"I'm sorry..."

"I just decided not to do it," Tori replied. "It's no big deal. Thanks, though, Cat."

"Yeah, you'll have other chances," the redhead innocently replied, her voice sweet and pure. "You're amazing at singing and stuff."

"Hmm, thanks, Kitty," the brunette happily replied, putting her hand around her friend's shoulder.

Jade forced her books into her locker. "I don't believe this," she snarled under her breath. "What makes her better than me?" Looking in a small mirror on the side of another student's locker, the near-Gothic girl examined her body; her stomach bulged out, her arms were weak and grotesquely thin. Looking down, Jade saw the disgusting truth, and tried to pull her shirt out more to cover her hideous fat. Fat meant lack of discipline, and that didn't get careers started. _How did this happen? _she asked herself, growing weak and upset. _Why isn't Tori going through something like this?...Because she's a twig. Why can't I be thin?_ The girl glanced over as Tori proudly strode down the hallway, holding her head up with confidence. Feeling a snarl form in her throat, Jade threw her last book into the metal case, then stormed off to her next class.

"I can't believe I made it," Beck exclaimed, not meaning to rub it in his girlfriend's face. "They loved how diverse of an actor I am."

"Wow, you sound just like Frank," Jade replied, obviously sarcastic.

"Cool," Beck jokingly replied. "I really wish you'd come with me. I could get you a great job. You're way more talented than me."

"Yeah," Jade coldly replied, not believing one word.

"Hey, this was just one try-out," Beck tried to comfort his friend. "Those guys don't know talent. You'll have another chance any day."

"...Practice your voices, Frank," Jade replied before kissing Beck, then departing. It was obvious the girl wasn't really interested in trying to be nice, not even to her boyfriend, who always tried to be there for her.

_Frank, _the young man repeated in his mind. It almost made him laugh, but he didn't have enough energy to show emotions right now.

Spencer sat on his bed, waiting for Carly to come home. She'd been gone about three hours. It wasn't anything new, but she'd usually call; she was responsible and sensitive to others like that. The boy knew he should be looking for her, but he just couldn't. The thing about the drugs was tearing him up inside. Finally, Spencer pulled a small straight-edge from his dresser, and pressed it into his arm. Slowly, he began to feel a sharp, intense pain shoot through his nerves. It was so real, so honest. Blood slowly formed a bubble above his flesh, then fell into a small stream that wrapped around his twisted arm. It wasn't like the first time, but it still felt kind of good, Spencer thought. At least this made him forget what a jerk he was. Socko didn't know, Carly didn't know, Dad definitely didn't know. Maybe Mom knew, but maybe not; Spencer never really thought about it all that much.

Quinn sat at her desk, reading over some books. Everything went good at her exam, but it was far from over. Her eyes hurt, and her hands were aching from the cool temperature in the room and from hours of motionlessness. The day had been too long and too useless to be good.

"What?" Lola asked, shocked at what she was hearing. "Dad, you can't do that...I passed my exams! You can't do this! I've done everything to earn it here! I have friends here!...You stupid son of a bitch! _I HATE YOU_!" Filled with fury, the girl smashed the phone on its reciever, then leaned against the wall, feeling tears well up in her eyes. Clenching her shoulder, Lola realized her life was over.

Meanwhile, the girl's father finished a large glass of Jack, then lay on the couch, motionless.

"I can't believe this," Lola whispered, her voice trembling as she clenched her blood-shot eyes and forehead. "This isn't fair." No money meant no school. No school meant no future. Anything was better than going back to the nightmare of repetitiveness the teenager called her home. _I have to make money some how, _she told herself. _The acting thing isn't gonna happen...I need money...Big money._ Horror struck the girl's heart; the idea was too horrible to imagine; only the lowest of the low resorted to something like this. It wasn't right or safe; it was the worst-case-scenario. "But I need the money," Lola argued with herself, feeling her throat throbbing.

"What's wrong?" Quinn asked, her voice filled with compassion as she walked down the hall.

"Nothing," Lola lied, regaining her composure. "My dad's being an idiot...Hey, I need to go into town tonight. You need anything?"

"Maybe a new book light," Quinn replied. "Here's the money...if you're going there. No big deal, though."

"Sure thing, Quinn," Lola replied, fighting back tears. "See you later." The teenager walked out of the building, went out into the parking lot under the pouring rain, then got into her small, red car. Taking a long, deep, shaky breath, Lola started her car, and drove into town. Lights flashed by the girl's car as she sped down the dark freeway. The city lights blurred through droplets of rain on the windshield. Lola wiped a tear from her eye, and tried to fix herself.

"Hi," the girl said, her voice trembling. "Um, your sign said you're looking to hire?"

"How old are you?" asked a woman with dark hair and glasses.

"Eighteen," Lola answered, forcing down a lump bulging in her throat.

"You look good for the job," the woman replied, not showing any emotion. "What do you want your stage name to be?"

"..." _No one should ever have to do this, _Lola thought, growing terminally upset by the second. _Especially not a kid. _"Snapper," she answered, getting a sickening image in her head.

"There's changing room in the back," the woman at the desk said, jotting something down on a piece of paper. "One of the guys'll tell you about the schedule and routine. Have fun." _Those words were sickening; "Have fun" Who would have fun dancing around like a whore on stage? Like a piece of meat in a leather top._

"Carly," Freddie called, knocking on the Shay's door. The teenager looked back at his apartment, which was open. An open window showed him the black sky, which was lined with the crimson reminder of dusk. Rain splattered on the glass in his apartment. While the boy was distracted, Carly opened the door; her hair was normal, but her mood dark.

"What?" the brunette asked, almost in a snarl.

"Oh," Freddie replied, snapping his head towards the girl. "Sorry, I just wanted to know if you wanted to work on some iCarly stuff tonight."

"I'm feeling kind of sick," Carly replied, her tone becoming sweet again. "I'm sorry." _Drugs didn't turn me into a bad person,_ she quickly told herself.

"Okay," Freddie said, defeated. "Um, do you want me to sit with you or bring you anything?"

"No, thanks," the brunette replied, her voice cold. The teenager shut the door. "Night, Freddie."


	3. Fall Part II

Death of Dreams

Chapter Three; Fall Part II

Outside, the sky was black, and the air was cold. Hollywood wasn't nearly as pretty as most people thought during the dead hour. Most of the lights were out, the theaters were empty, and the Walk of Fame was all but forgotten. Fame doesn't survive this hour.

Jade wrapped a tape measure around her exposed waist, looking down at what she saw as a bulging, unattractive stomach; however, her stomach was practically flat and fairly toned. Pulling off the yellow rope, the girl looked at her measurements, which were decreasing, but not by much. _Why is Tori so thin? _she asked, feeling sick to her stomach. _How does she do it? I can't believe this is happening to me! _Leaning over the toilet, the dark-haired teenager forced her pointer finger down her throat, causing her whole body to tremble. Suddenly, her throat began to burn with flowing, chunk-composed bile that splashed into the waters bellow her. Gagging, Jade dropped onto her hands and knees, trying to get the last of the vomit out of her system. It was terrible, but she had other concerns right now.

"Jade?" called the voice of Jadeyn's mother, Suzeanne. Suzeanna had always been kind of overweight, but she was pretty. She was like Mindy Cohn; Jade wasn't the type of person who could pull that off, though. "Honey, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," the girl shortly answered, her voice echoing. Her mother was genuinely concerned, which made Jade regret her tone. "...Thanks, though."

"Spencer," Carly whispered, gently shaking her brother. This was ridiculous, but a big deal.

"Hmm," the boy gently replied, awaking from his cloudy dreams. "What's wrong?"

"I need to run over to Sam's really quick," the brunette whispered, growing nervous. "I really need to tell her something."

"You sure you should be out this late?" Spencer asked, rolling onto his side.

"I'm just going right there and back," Carly answered, not seeming to understand her brother's concern. "I'll be fine...Promise. Love you." The girl kissed her brother on his forehead. "Get some sleep," she sweetly whispered before slipping out the door.

Pounding on Sam's door, Carly didn't even get the idea that Pam may be in one of her drunken fits. "Sam!" the girl whispered, trying to be as loud as possible. "Sam, open the door!"

Sam ran from her bedroom to the living room, and answered the door. "What the hell 'er you doing?" she demanded, her voice in a furious whisper.

"I really want more," Carly replied, her hushed voice growing tense. "I just really want to do it right now. I can't until the morning. Do you have some?"

"Carly, take it easy," the blond told her friend, trying to comfort her. "It's hard starting out. You need to control yourself, though."

"It's too hard!" Carly replied, her tone growing louder. "Please, I can't make it through the night. Please!"

"Okay, okay," Sam gave in. "But you're gonna have to do it here. You're way out of control." The two walked into Sam's room, where the girl reached under her bed and poured a small handful of the powder into Carly's hand. "Try to go slow. Trust me, it's not a good idea to take too much at once."

The brunette snuffed back, taking in every grain of ecstasy into her nose. It felt so good; all the tension was gone, and she could finally relax. "Thanks, baby," she said, not realizing how stupid she sounded.

"Lemme take you back to your apartment," Sam offered, taking Carly's arm.

"Okay, _Mom_," Carly jokingly said, her tone a little loud. Sam took the girl back to her apartment, layed her down in her bed, then tucked her in.

"Stay here," the blond instructed, knowing how unstable Carly could be when under the influence. "I'll talk to you in the morning, okay?"

"Okay," Carly answered, trying not to giggle.

"Okay, next up is a new girl named Snapper!" called out a man with spiked white hair and a black suit on. "You're gonna love this one, boys!"

The red curtains parted, revealing a poll and a light layer of fog. _This wasn't how my solo was supposed to be, _Lola cried in her mind as she walked out onto center stage, clad in a sleazy, skimpy, black one-piece leotard lined with blood red. The outfit covered her breasts in the style of an under-fabricated bikini top, then sailed down the center of her stomach in a thin line that only covered the very middle of her torso. Around the pelvis was a bottom piece that barely did its job in the back, and left every inch of the legs visible to a desiring public. Her hair was down and slightly curled. Glitter accented her face, as did trampy blue eye liner and red lipstick. Swaying her hips back and forth, putting her body on display with her hands proudly planted on her waist, Lola marched up to the poll, dipped down next to it, then wrapped her arms around it. Swallowing a heavy, almost bloody lump her throat, the horrified teenager twisted her legs around the metal bar, and thrust herself upward and in a spiral motion, making every twenty to fifty year-old man in the bar go nuts. _Perverts! _she cried, her anger and self-hatred growing. _Pedophiles!_ Everything was wrong; she was supposed to be an actress, not some cheap piece of eye-candy for old men and drunks. What choice did she have, though? She needed to earn money to stay at PCA.

The night dragged by like a slow-moving stream of blood out of a rotting wound for Lola. However, Carly slept like a baby. Sam didn't have any trouble reaching the realm of dreams either. Cat's untouched, peaceful mind soon found itself surrounded by singing bunnies and rainbows; like every night. With the help of some prescribed pills, Katrina fell asleep early, and stayed at peace all night. Freddie, after looking up some swimsuit pictures on his computer, was out like a light. Dana managed to fall asleep by visiting "Dr. Pill", which always relaxed her. Quinn was up late, worried about her interview. However, consciousness soon became unbearable, and she fell into a daze. Tori lay awake in her bed, staring at the shadows covering her ceiling. Zoey cuddled her plush octopus, which she hadn't done since fourth grade, and managed to fall asleep after several hours. Beck was asleep before he left the couch in his living room, but Jade was still awake when dawn arrived.

_I can't believe I blew that, _Tori thought early that morning. _...I have to get another chance. Maybe with someone who's not a pervert. That was so creepy. _The teenager couldn't help but maintain an aura of regret in her mind. Grabbing the corner of her sheet, Tori stared at the ceiling.

"Carly!" Freddie called, knocking on the door to the teen's apartment. "Carly, please!" The boy began banging on the door, growing desperate. Unfortunately, Sam hadn't come by yet, and Carly woke up sick to her stomach and in a very angry down state.

Running out of her room and to the living room, the brunette thrust the door open. "What?" Carly snarled, extremely aggravated.

"We have to talk about iCarly," the boy answered. "You've been putting me off for days. We have deadlines, and..."

"You know what?" Carly furiously interrupted. "It's like five thirty in the morning. I don't need this shit right now. Okay?...Just... just leave me alone."

Freddie stood still, shocked at what he just heard; Carly was never like this; she never talked like that to anyone. The girl then shut the door right in the teenager's face.

Sam sat next to Carly, her arm around her shoulder. Carly's face was buried in her hands as she cried. "Sssh," the blond whispered, trying to calm her friend. "It's okay. I should've been here earlier."

"I just..." Carly trembled out between gasps. "I feel so horrible. He didn't do anything. I'm such a jerk."

"Look, you can apologize when you're feeling better," Sam replied, her voice uplifting. "You just need to calm down right now. People get like this after a high. Just relax."

The brunette tried to stop crying, then grabbed her shoulder, looking up at the ceiling. "Okay," she whispered, her voice distorted by a large lump in her throat. Her face was stained dark red, as were her poor, tired eyes. Carly's usually-perfect brown hair was in horrible tassels, making her look extremely torn up. "I'll talk to him later."

"Where were you last night?" Quinn asked as Lola walked out of the shower. The disgusting, gaudy smell of stripper-grade perfume still hovered the teenager's body.

"I was out driving all night," Lola lied. "At about four, I pulled off and fell asleep. I'm really sorry, but I didn't wanna wake you up to come get me."

"I'm just glad you're okay," the dark-haired girl replied. "Hey, wanna get some breakfast?"

"Sure," Lola answered, wrapping her hair up in a pink towel. "Oh...Sorry, I forgot your book light."

"That's okay," Quinn said, her voice sweet. "Sounds like you had a rough night. Come on, I'll get you some coffee." The two walked off to the cafeteria together. However, Lola couldn't help but feel disgusted with herself; making her unable to get close to Quinn again.

Heaving out another gruesome splash of vomit into the toilet, Jade closed her eyes, and tried to imagine her system becoming clean.

"Jade?" Cat called, having no idea what was going on. "Is that you? Are you okay?"

Clearing her throat, the dark-haired girl held back tears, and stumbled closer to the door, doubled over in pain. "Yeah, Cat..." she deceived her friend. "I'm fine..." Faking a smile, Jade felt herself collapse inside. "I'll be out in a few...We're still on for your place tonight, right?"

"Sure," Cat answered, her voice sweet and unsuspecting as always. "For Bingo and red velvets, right?"

"Just like always," Jade answered, keeping a weak smile on her face. "Just like we used to do," she whispered, tears welling up in her eyes. Her throat began to ache, making even breathing difficult.

Katrina stretched her leg on a wooden beam against the wall, occasionally looking at herself struggle in the mirror. _It'll all pay off, _she kept telling herself. _I have to be famous...Everyone has to love me..._

Meanwhile, Beck stood outside a studio, preparing for his audition at a local theater. Clearing his throat, the boy began to recite Frank Welker's old lines; "Alright, gang," he began, lifting his voice to a higher-pitched but still manly (in a campy style), like that of Freddie Jones from Scooby-Doo, Where Are You! "Decep...Decepticons," Beck continued, bringing his voice into a low, rumbly tone, light that of Soundwave from The Transformers. "Okay," he said, using his natural tone and pitch of voice. "I can do this." The teenager entered the building, and did everything he knew Frank would do; it felt amazing, like he was truly succeeding. The director loved it, as did so many others, and the job was his. _Frank, _Jade's words echoed in Beck's mind, taunting him.

Zoey sat on her bed, studying more about interviewing skills and the subject she was to debate. Her blond hair lay gently on the sheets as her eyes studied word after word after every word. _Oh my gosh, _she thought, feeling her stomach flip sideways. Zoey closed her eyes and clenched her belly, hoping the pain would subside.

"What's wrong with you?" Dana asked, almost sounding sincere.

"What do you care?" the blond replied, sounding angry.

"...We've been roommates for years," Dana began, walking over to Zoey's bed. "We used to be friends...I know I've been a jerk, and I'm sorry."

Zoey remained still, not knowing how to fathom Dana's words. "Whatever happened to you?" she finally asked.

"...Things changed," the shining-haired girl answered, sounding uneasy. "Do you want some help studying?"

"Yes, please," the blond teenager answered, more than willing to forgive and forget. "And...thanks." The shining-haired girl sat down beside Zoey, and began talking over the interviewing process.

Tori lay alone on her bed, looking out the window into the city of Los Angeles. Things seemed so wrong now a day; Hours went by slower, and seemed more and more repetitive. _I made the right choice, _she found herself thinking; trying so hard to convince herself. Those words still buzzed in her mind like furious wasps. _Taking off your clothes for a show. It wouldn't be anything sexual...And so beautiful. Beautiful..._

Staring into a toilet, Tori tried to hold back vomit burning in the back of her throat. Her breath was heavy, and her eyes were blurred. The room felt like it was spinning, and Victoria could barely hold herself up. Life was horrible; days were useless; maybe chances weren't coming. Standing in the hallway of Hollywood Arts, the teenager thought about everything.

"Hey, Tori," Cat called, skipping over to her friend. Cat was always full of life; full of love; and always so innocent. She was like a child. Why would she worry about the future?

"Hey, Kitty," Victoria happily replied, giving her friend a hug. "How you doing?"

"Super terrific," Cat jokingly answered. "You?"

"Good," the brunette lied, faking a smile that would win her an Academy Award. "Cat...do you think I'm smart?"

"Sure I do," the redhead answered, sounding almost sad while wearing a pouty look on her innocent face. "You're a straight-A student, you always give good advice,...and you always know what's right. Why would you even ask something like that?"

"No reason," Tori lied once again, her voice straight. "...Thanks, Cat." With that, the girl walked away.

"I'm so sorry," Carly said, trying to keep her voice from cracking as she stared at the ground.

"It's fine," Freddie happily accepted, deeply wanting to keep his friendship with the girl. Carly was so sweet and so nice; so pretty, and so comforting. "Is everything okay?"

The brunette nodded. "You wanna work on iCarly?" she asked with a smile on her pure face.

"You know it," the boy happily answered, jumping off the couch. "My lady," he jokingly added, holding his hand out for Carly to grab.

"Charmed, mousier," the girl replied, faking an eloquent English accent as she daintily raised her hand to grab her friend's. The brunette boy pulled Carly up, and then followed her up to the studio in the attic.

After about five minutes, Sam showed up, and was more than ambitious to do the show.

_"iCarly's the only I do that I really feel good about," the blond told Carly earlier. Carly kind of heard her, but was focusing on other things. "I'm really glad we're friends," the brunette replied, her voice completely dazed, and a smile on her face._

"That was great, guys," Carly happily said after the show was over.

After Sam walked out of the room and shut the door, Freddie put his hands in his pockets and walked over to Carly. His heart started racing; he'd always been a friend of Carly. Maybe this would be easy. "Um, Carly," he began, feeling his heart to pound. "W-would you, um...Nah, never mind."

"What?" Carly replied, sounding like she really wanted to hear what he had to say, just as Freddie'd hoped.

"Um...would you, uh, like to go...see a movie some time?" Freddie asked, putting everything on the line. Carly had turned him down before; time after time. Ever since, they'd become an established thing; Carly and her puppy-dog lover. Everyone knew they'd be nothing more than friends for the rest of their lives.

_I really want to do some more ecstasy, _the brunette thought, her heart tensing up. _Just one more time. _"...Uh, I don't know, Freddie," she replied, sounding somewhat uncomfortable; like she'd been wronged, almost. "I'm kind of busy, and it'd be kind of weird. Thanks for asking, though." That hurt so much.

_I am such a moron, _Freddie pounded into himself. _I am such a jerk. She knows that. I've been so stupid. I don't have a right to act the way I do with her. I freakin' hate myself._ Carly walked out of the room, then went down the stairs, leaving the boy alone.

"Hey," called a familiar voice. Turning his head, Freddie saw Sam standing in the doorway, staring right at him. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing," the brunette boy lied. Freddie started to leave, not in the mood for one of Sam's mockings.

"She turned you down again, didn't she?" the blond asked, her voice blunt. The boy kept walking, feeling his face get hot and red. "Her loss."

"...What?" Freddie sharply replied, turning around. _What's she want to hit me with now?_

"You're the most devoted person she's ever had in her life," Sam continued. "Why the heck would she turn you down?" The ecstasy still tasted good on the girl's lips.

"Are you serious?" the boy asked, his anger still tingling in his neck. Sam never acted like this; not to him. "I don't need you making fun of me."

"I'm not," the girl confidently replied, walking over to her friend. "You're actually kind of cool, Fredbag. Why do you keep wasting your time chasing girls, though?"

"I don't," Freddie defended himself, growing uncomfortable.

"Yes you do," the blond shot back, walking closer to the boy. "You constantly go after girls who don't care about you. Ones who don't know anything about you. It's stupid, you know." This wasn't like Sam at all. _This'll be fun, _she thought, walking up to Freddie until he was pressed against the wall. _He is cute. Who'd call me on it?_ "Why do you do it?"

"...I don't know," Freddie nervously answered. "Please, get away." The boy felt himself grow extremely uneasy. His first inclination was to fold up to protect his stomach and face from assault.

"I don't wanna hurt you," Sam said, practically in a whisper. The girl leaned towards Freddie, and pressed her lips into his. For a second, there was silence; Sam then pulled away, leaving her and her friend weak.

Freddie remained against the wall, breathing heavily. _Wow, _he thought, unable to fathom what he was thinking; how he was starting to view Sam. Maybe she wasn't just a petty savage. Maybe she was beautiful. Maybe there was hope. "Why'd you do that?" he finally managed to say.

"Cuz I felt like it," the blond girl answered, sounding more serious than usual. "Do you want more?"

"Like what?" the boy asked.

"I think you know," Sam playfully answered, letting her fingers walk across Freddie's shoulder. The two stared at one another, and couldn't keep smiles on their faces. This was so exciting, so new, so...wrong for the teenage boy.

Freddie put his hands around Sam's shoulders, came in, and kissed her on her soft lips. The blond pushed against the boy, moving her lips quickly and aggressively. Feeling himself start to sweat, Freddie put his fingers in Sam's long, perfectly curled hair, and started toying with each lock. The girl giggled at her friend. Soon, the two fell on the wooden floor, each one kissing intensely. The brunette grabbed the bottom of his friend's shirt, and pulled it upward, revealing her pink, lightly-laced bra. Freddie sighed, overcome by sexual ecstasy, and lay down on her stomach, pressing his cheek into her's. Sam put her arms around the boy's back, breathing heavily.

"Why won't you talk to me?" Cat begged over the phone. "Jade, where are you?" Jade lay on her bathroom floor, breathing heavily and trying to hold back tears; forcing herself to vomit had never been this horrifying; this punishing. She couldn't even walk. Moving at all hurt. "Jade, I miss you," the girl begged, her voice cracking up and growing frantic.

_Forcing her bleeding finger deeper into her throat, Jade felt herself start to burn from the neck down. Her eyes dilated, then blurred over with vicious, honest white light. Falling weak, Jade's body collapsed on the floor, letting hair scatter on the cold floor._

Slowly, painfully, the sun set over the hills overlooking Los Angeles, clouding over the city, and bringing requiem to its inhabitants.


	4. Winter Overture

Death of Dreams

Chapter Four: Winter Overture

"You're amazing," the woman told Beck, reviewing some of his vocal performances.

"Thanks," Beck replied, futilely trying to hide a smile forming on his face.

"Welcome aboard, Frank," the blond-haired girl said, extending her hand to the boy.

"What?" the teenager asked, growing confused.

"I said welcome, Beck," the woman answered, smiling.

Lola spun around on the poll until her legs were raw. Glitter flew in clouds on the stage as men cheered and threw money at her. Her hair swinging behind her, the teenager closed her eyes, trying to lock out the horrible reality. _I hate this, _Lola thought, holding back tears from her over-made-up eyes.

Spencer and Socko lay on the floor, staring at the ceiling as the Meth settled in their systems. "Shit," Spencer exclaimed, barely able to stop laughing. Everything felt amazing.

"I am blown away," Socko exclaimed, feeling his entire body float. "Thanks, Spence. This is the best freakin' idea you've ever had."

"Yeah it is," the brunette boy replied, his eyes closed and a large smile on his face. Inside, something felt wrong, though.

Sam lay atop Freddie, kissing him under the covers of his bed. The two laughed. "Wanna do it again?" Sam asked, smiling and showing her perfect teeth.

"You know it," the boy answered, excited. Freddie put his hands on the back of his friend's head, feeling her soft hair, then pulled her down to his chest. "This is so awesome."

Sam sat alone in the corner of her room. Every single shade was closed, and she could feel herself violently perspire. Her stomach sick, the teenager stared at the door with every blink. Pam could be anywhere, and she'd sure as hell know what her daughter had been doing for the past month. With ever hard, rage-fueled breath, Sam grew more and more hostile. Her teeth ground together, and her forehead couldn't stay dry. _I can't believe what I did...and with Freddie! _she hollered in her mind, feeling her throat tighten in the front.

Quinn waited up, watching her digital clock count down every hour. Lola had promised to be with her tonight; they were going to talk about the interviews together. For so many nights Quinn had spent countless hours awake, waiting for her friend.

"Quinn," called a timid, familiar voice.

"Hi, Lola," the dark-haired girl greeted her friend, trying to keep quiet. "Where were you?"

"Sorry," Lola replied, clenching her coat closed, trying to hid the reef she was wearing underneath. The smell of cheap perfume still stung her body. "I had a lot of running to do. You weren't up long, were you?"

"Only a few hours," Quinn answered, throwing the sheets off her back. "Do you wanna study tonight?"

"I'm sorry," the showgirl responded, trying to lug her body onward. "I'm exhausted. We can do it tomorrow, okay?"

"You've been putting me off for weeks," the girl shot back, trying to keep her voice quiet and friendly. "You know, just...just forget it."

Heart-broken and ashamed, Lola kept her jaw dropped, and walked out of the room, gently shutting Quinn's door behind her. Finally, tears began to stream from the teenager's eyes; it felt like she was broken. Burning, drowning tears kept pouring down her cheeks, washing away her trampy makeup.

Dana lay on her bed, a smile locked on her face. Around her, the room was pitch black and cool. Zoey had fallen asleep while studying at her desk. The interview had been taking a powerful toll on her health and social life lately.

Meanwhile, Katrina slept in her bed, sound asleep and dreaming of her limitless future. "Yeah," Tori spoke softly into the phone in the next room. "Yeah, I wanna do it. I need to get into the business...Okay, and...Thank you." Hanging up her cell, the girl let out a sigh, and stared at the window. Even now, Daniel was still terrifying. However, the future was too important to let feelings get in the way.

Jade stared at herself in the mirror, tightening measuring tape around her stomach until it burned. _Finally, _she thought, feeling somewhat relieved for the first time in so long. _I'm almost there. I'm not a slob anymore._ Feeling tired and dizzy, the girl lay down on her bed, and fell asleep.

"Jade?" Cat's sad voice repeated on the answering machine. "Jade, are you there? Come on, it's been like a month since I've heard from you. Whatever I did, I'm sorry. Please pick up..." Hanging up her phone, the redheaded girl, whose hair was starting to return to its original, near-black color, sat down on her bed, letting her body collapse. "Maybe Tori still likes me," she said, feeling hope. Dialing her phone again, Cat folded in her lips in eager anticipation. After five electronic beeps, voice mail picked up. _Tori Vega's line. Sorry I'm not answering. Please leave a message._ Keeping an agonized smile on her innocent face, the teenager set down her cell, and stared at the wall. Jade had been her best friend for as long as she could remember; they were like sisters. While Jade was nasty to many, she was always nice; almost sweet to Cat. The two were extremely close. Jade always understood her, listened to her problems, and always made her feel special. Tori; she was one of Cat's best buddies. The two were one and the same in so many ways. They never fought; never argued. For years, the girls were so close. "Why don't they like me anymore?" Cat asked herself, feeling tears well up in her eyes.

Tori lay on her bed, her stomach feeling like it was caught in a blender. All she'd thought about for weeks was her future; she went to Hollywood Arts to make a name for herself; to be famous and loved. It didn't seem wrong. Along the way, she'd made the best friends she could ever imagine. Andre', Cat, Robbie, and even Jade; they let her be herself. They were caring, honest, and real with her. What had happened to them? Why did they fade? _I hate this, _Victoria thought as hot tears blocked out her eyes and covered her cheeks. _I don't want to use my body like this...But I have to have a good future. Everything'll be okay soon._

"I miss Tori..." Cat whispered with a throbbing, burning throat as she stared at her ceiling. "I miss Jade. What happened? I didn't think I was being bad to them...It's all my fault. I miss them so much." Reality hurt; it stung like a bee, and dug around in her weak underflesh like a needle from a furious doctor. There had to be some escape; some way to make everything happy again. That's Cat's life; happiness, sweetness. Catarina looked into the corner of her room, and saw a thick rope resting in the corner. The rope was for a camping trip she, Jade, and Tori would take one day. One day when they were all friends. Maybe that day was never coming. Crying and sniffling, the girl grabbed the rope, fastened it into a noose shape, and tightened it around her soft, peach-smelling neck. Tighter and tighter; air grew thicker, more surreal. Finally, Cat's eyes dilated, and she felt herself become light. With a sigh of relief, the teenager took off the rope, and lay down on the floor, breathing heavily and happy again.

"I have to keep this weight off," Jade told herself, shakily sticking her finger into her mouth. Feeling herself, gag, the girl started to choke. Nothing came out, just horrible dry heaves that made her whole body tremble. It felt like the entire room was closing around on her, ready to crush her and swallow her. Everything was scary. Gasping and gagging, Jade managed to suffer out something, "Help me!" The room started to fade into darkness, but she could vaguely see her parents rush in to help her; they were terrified. Then, everything went black.

Knocking on the door at the address Daniel gave her, Tori felt her heart pound viciously. Then, the door opened. "Hi, Tori," Daniel warmly greeted. His voice was sickening. The air outside was cold; icy and distant.

"Hi," the teenager answered, wearing a fake smile on her face. "Ready to go?"

"All my life," Daniel proudly answered, his heart warmed. "Please, come in." Tori followed the man inside his home, listening to the door close behind her. "Here, this'll make it easier." Daniel handed the girl a white, powdery pill.

_This is a nightmare, _Tori thought, feeling her mind fade away from her body. Everything turned blurry. _Maybe it'll make me forget this, though. _"Thanks," she said, taking the pill, then swallowing it with a big, deep gulp.

"Now, would you like to go on the couch?" Daniel asked the girl, his voice patient and caring. "You can set your top over there."

"Alright," Victoria answered, her voice weak and uneasy as she grabbed the bottom of her soft, pink top. "After we do the publicity shots, we'll get to singing, right?"

"Whatever you want," the young man answered, like he was her father; like he cared; like he could make everything better.

Meanwhile, Katrina looked at herself in the mirror, awoken from her sleep by a weird dream, and gently, slowly brushed her long, thick, dark hair. Everyone knew Trina thought she was the center of the universe, but her struggle for perfection went unnoticed by all but herself. Suddenly, her cell phone rang. "Hello?" she answered, keeping her voice low but serious.

"Beautiful, beautiful," Daniel exclaimed, snapping picture after picture of Tori as she moved her body into different erotic poses. "Perfect, flawless! Drop dead sexy."

Tori sat up, threw her long, brown locks behind her head, and rested her hand on the arm rest of the couch as Daniel snapped more nude shots of her thin body. She felt beautiful, powerful. _Thosepillsworkingforyou? _"Yeah," Victoria hoarsly but happily answered, wearing a big, wide, consumed smile on her beautiful face. Flashes flared one after another after another all night, it felt.

"You want more?" the young man asked the teenager in the morning.

Pulling the sheet over her exposed back, Tori weakly nodded. Her eyes hurt, and her forehead gently burned with icy dullness. "You have any?" she asked, desiring relief.

"Those things are really expensive," Daniel answered, shattering Tori's hopes. "But I know how we can get the money."

Jade's body rocked back and forth as a group of doctors rushed her on a gurney. Lights dangled and flashed above her, but she didn't know anything of what was happening now. Her Gothic makeup fading, Jade's face began to look different; her eyes were surrounded by deep, slightly red bags, her face wrinkled, and her hair scattered around her head. Something inside her burned.

Freddie and Sam bit into each other's lips, causing Sam's to start bleeding and feel raw. Nothing felt special anymore. "Stop," Freddie interrupted, pulling back. "I...This doesn't feel right anymore." _The first times I've ever had sex, or anything even related to sex, and I'm already sick of it, _the boy told himself, feeling helpless and wrong all over. _Only I could mess this up. What is it with me? I don't wanna lose this._

"Oh, hell with it!" Sam angrily shot back, wracked with sexual distress and rage. The girl smashed her face into Freddie's, violently tearing into his lips with her own. _Nothing! There's nothing! _she screamed inside her mind, feeling her pulse flare; her blood flow like rapids.

After the ordeal, the girl sat alone in her bedroom, looking at the darkness around her. Her teeth ground together, tightening until they nearly cracked. Suddenly, the door flew open. "What the hell have you been doing?" Pam demanded, her voice laced with hatred and anger. Sam looked up at her mother, terrified.

Carly stabbed into her arm with another needle, watching blood ooze out of the red, burning, raw flesh. Her arms were both lined with red, tiny holes. Holes that hurt, stung with hot intensity. Beneath the cuts and gashes, her weak, soupy flesh festered with itching, disgusting burns. However, she felt amazing; high, defeated. "I need more," Carly whispered, never wanting to come back to hated Earth. Her fingers started trembling, and her mouth was watering.

"Carly," Spencer called, his voice sweet and caring like it sometimes became. The young man opened his sister's door, and started to walk closer to her. "Carly, are you okay?"

Her ravaged arms exposed, Carly shot up. "Get out of my room!" she yelled. Spencer had no right; he was always barging in on her life; making her do things she didn't want to; he didn't care about her; he just wanted to control her. Of course, he didn't leave. "Get out!" Carly's voice became a high-pitched scream filled only by her anger and frustration. "Get out!" The teenager pushed her older brother hard into a wall, then kept pushing against him, desperate to get away.

"Carly," Spencer weakly pleaded, not understanding anything that was going on.

The back of her neck burning and flaring, Carly kept focing her brother deeper into the wall. "Get away from me!" she hollered, terrified and furious. "Get the fuck away from me!" Her voice rang with shear rage and hatred. "Get away from me! I hate you!"

Sam smashed into the wall of her room, her entire body turning tender. Desperate to protect herself from more pain, the teenager folded her knees up in front of her stomach, and covered her face with her clenched fists. "Please," she begged, fighting back tears. But Pam kept punching, kept kicking. Sam saw herself splattered against the wall, bleeding out of her mouth. With a hard thud, she smacked into the hard ground, making the bones in her arm and ribs crack. It all hurt so much, but Pam couldn't hurt her anymore, she thought. "Stop it," Sam begged.

"You worthless little tramp," Pam snarled, thrusting her foot into her daughter's spine, her teeth clenched until it hurt. "Get up off the floor! Get up off the floor!" Pamela grabbed Sam's shoulder, then thrust her onto her back on the cold carpet. "You think you can get away with anything? You think you can act like this and still be treated like a princess? Well, you're wrong!" The woman kicked Sam hard in the side, making her twitch like a little rat dying in on a sewer floor. _Can I sleep over at your house tonight? Sam asked, her voice sweet and pure. "Sure," Carly answered, giving and loving as always. "Wanna watch a"_

Punches kept coming, thrashing Sam like a sack of cotton in a combine. "Please, stop it," she begged, tears flowing out of her eyes and her throat raw. No one could ever see Sam so weak; so scared; so desperate for everything to leave her alone. "I'm dirt! I'm crap. Please, just stop it. I'll do whatever you want, I'm sorry. Please!"

Sam lay on the floor, not sure if Pam was gone or not. Everything throbbed, burned, and twitched in a way that felt like her muscles were rubbing into her sharp, extruding bones; making the flesh on them raw and aching. Moaning in agony, the girl crawled onward, no matter how much it throbbed just to breathe. Everything was so unbearable. Finally, Sam managed to crawl onto her mattress, put her right arm, which was surely broken, up on her pillow, and pressed her face into the cool, comforting sheets. Burning tears stained her heavy, sticky eye lids, leaving marks on the blankets shielding her. Sobbing out loud, the girl tried only to hide from her mother. She'd never felt so helpless...except for all the times before when this had happened.

"Sam," Carly called, pounding on the door. That night, Pam had gone out on a binder; one that would probably kill her, leaving Sam alone to cry and hate herself. "Sam, open up."

"Come in," the blond called, too weak to get up or even open her eyes. Her face was pressed deep into her pillow, hiding everything. In a few minutes, Carly was in her friend's bedroom.

"Do you have any more ecstasy?" she asked, as if that was all she cared about.

"I don't want to," Sam mumbled, half aware of what was going on. The girl stuck a needle into her left arm, not bothering to push in the tab or even take it out.

"You look silly," the brunette said, pulling the shot right out of her friend's vein, causing it to bleed fast. "You want me to stop that?"

"No," Sam answered, rolling onto her back, then pressing a sheet into the gash in her arm. Her right arm had barely any strength to give, and was trembling in shear pain. "I think I'm done here."

"What?" Carly asked, not understanding what was going on.

"I'm leaving," the blond answered, not even opening her eyes. "Get your stuff, we're going out."

"I'll call Freddie," the brunette girl said, pulling out her phone. "This'll be fun."

Tori stood in front of her bathroom mirror, gently stroking her lips with dark, almost purple lipstick, making them shine with dark aura. Her face was hued an almost ghostly white color, and her eyes were lined with pitch-black liner that made them like living shadows. Her hair was colored black and parted towards the right in the mirror, pulled back into a long ponytail behind her head. Her lashes were long and curved upward, like blades. Her heart pounded, her stomach flipped and twisted viciously, never allowing any relief from her nausea. _This is what it takes, _she told herself. _This is gonna make everything right. I need those pills. This'll be alright. I'm gonna be...I'm gonna feel better._ Fog covered parts of the mirror, making it harder for Victoria to see herself.

Cat looked over scrap books she and Jade put together in elementary school, remembering those different, fun times they used to have every day. Maybe she and Tori could have had those kind of times; maybe they could have been happy today. But that wasn't gonna happen. Catarina threw down the book, furious at everything, then put the rope around her rough neck, Several layers of skin had peeled away, making the flesh red and almost raw to touch. Pulling the thick, pointed strands of the rope, Cat tried to feel good, but couldn't. Tighter and tighter, but nothing. Taking in a deep gasp, then holding it, the girl yanked the rope tighter, then looked at her room blurr over, then fade.

Someone screamed when they saw Catarina laying motionless on the floor; her mouth wide open, and her soft eyes closed.

Dana tore her old pictures off the shelves against the walls, and threw them onto the floor with loud screams. The glass shattered, the frames broke, and she never felt any better. Muttering vicious curses under her breath, the teenager grabbed the sheets on her bed, and tore them down the center, dividing their fabrics with a loud ripping sound. Then, Dana picked up her pillow, tore the left side off, and chucked out the stuffing, grunting and hollering constantly. Her anger boiling, the girl thrust down her old comfort object, and started clawing into the wall. Nothing took away the anger; nothing made it stop.

Lola opened the door, and stared at the girl, her mouth open. Dana stopped only for a second, her breath so heavy it moved her body up, then down. Scared, Lola slowly walked back, and shut the door gently behind her.

"There's nobody there for me," Quinn muttered, adding two chemicals together on her desk. Once they sizzled and bubbled, the girl smiled, then poured them into a clear glass bottle, and held it below her nose. The hot, steaming smell filled Quinn's nostrils, clogging everything, and making her feel light all over.

Thousands of maggots, flies, and spiders crawled all over her arms; tickling every nerve with their millions of small, hairy, quilled legs. They sniffed her, itched her, and started to consume her. Dana took in a deep, shaky breath, pinched her arm, and quickly pulled back, ripping out several small hairs, and stinging her skin. But the bugs didn't stop; they crawled in through her pours, and started wiggling around, trying to find a wider spot for their fat, oily, hairy bodies. It hurt, burned, stung, and made her mad. "Ow," she loudly whined, closing her eyes as she looked up in pain. Again, Dana grabbed her arm, and yanked back, removing a tiny piece of her outer skin. Pick after pick, she started taking herself apart. The bugs had to get out and off her body. Then, Dana felt them on her face, and started plucking out her eyes lashes, trembling and shaking.

"I don't know any of this," Zoey confessed, grabbing her racing forehead.

"You're still up?" Rebecca asked her friend.

"Yeah," the blond answered, setting down her book. "I'm dead."

"You know what you need?" the girl asked, sounding sympathetic. "A break. Come on." Rebecca took Zoey's hand, and pulled her into the hallway.

"What are you doing?" the blond persisted, growing irritated. "I have to study."

"You're killing yourself over this," Rebecca replied. "Look, just take one hour to relax. You'll do way better on the test if you take some time for yourself. Look, there's this awesome party on campus, and it's just what you need."

"...One hour?" Zoey finally gave in.

"Then I'll leave you alone," the dark-haired girl promised.

"Okay," Zoey accepted, taking off her glasses. "Who's gonna be there?"

"You name 'em, they're there," Rebecca happily answered. The two ran down the hallway, then went towards the boy's dorms. Above the girls, the night's sky was pitch black and cold.

Sam, Carly, and Freddie jumped into Pam's old SUV. Sam pulled the key forward, and listened to the engine rev. "We're good!" she called, looking back at Freddie.

"Whoa, your mom's coming," Carly called out, shaking Sam's shoulder from the shotgun seat.

"Hang on," the blond replied, thrusting the gear into reverse. Looking back, Sam saw the buildings behind her grow closer at a quick speed. Then, she shifted into overdrive, and sped away.

"What the hell are you doing?" Pam demanded, her voice laced with raw hatred and anger.

"Yeah!" Carly hollered, watching Pamela fade away in the rear view mirror.

"This is freakin' awesome!" Sam hollered, her voice so loud it was cracking.

"This is crazy," Freddie said, excited to be doing something so dangerous. It was amazing; so wrong. "Where we goin'?"

"Wherever the hell we want!" Sam yelled, throwing her long hair back.

Carly took a deep gulp of coffee, and watched the horizon grow closer. "I don't...I don't feel so good," she said, getting dizzy.

"Can you hold out 'til we get to L.A.?" Sam asked, looking away from the road for a split second.

"Yeah," Carly answered, tightly clenching her right arm. Freddie looked at his friend for a second, then looked at the orange-hued lights flash by the car.

"Your new film will start momentarily," the blond woman said, her voice sweet.

"Thank you," Beck replied, trying to keep a smile off his face. The three executives went into the theater, leaving Beck to admire the sign illuminated in the night's sky. However, what he say terrified him. "No," he whispered, feeling himself slip away. Above him, in big, bold, black letters, it was spelled out; "Starring Frank Welker". Beck began to scream, grabbing the back of his throbbing neck. "No!" This was wrong; nothing felt right anymore. Who was he? All around him, the boy was chilled.

Zoey sat at a table, listening to the blaring dance music and taking in the violent strobe lights flashing. Her stomach was sick and floating with butterflies. She should be back at her dorm studying.

"Hey," greeted a young man with light facial hair. "Having fun?"

"Not really," the girl answered, too stressed to be tactful. "You?"

"I could be," the boy answered. "If you'd dance with me."

"Oh, I don't know, I..." Zoey began, tense and indecisive.

"Please," the young man persisted, sounding almost desperate. "I've seen you before...You're amazing."

Feeling bad for the boy, Zoey swallowed her emotions, and agreed. The two danced for about ten minutes, and it felt right. "You wan' a drink?" the young man offered, his voice hushed.

"What kind?" Zoey replied, her breath heavy and her body lightly kissed with sweat.

"The hard kind," the boy proudly answered. "I'll do it if you do it."

Zoey pressed the cool, sweating glass against her hot, moist lips, and let the burning, freezing liquid splash into her mouth. _Her pupils dilated; her pulse soared, sweat trickled out of her thousands of pours; her breath grew heavy. _"...Yeah," she shrieked, excited.

"Want more?" the boy asked, sounding more than supportive.

"Sure," Zoey answered, holding out her shot glass. The teenager filled up the blond's glass, which she quickly gulped down. _"I love this girl!" Two guys poured a kag of shining light-brown alcohol on the blond, soaking her face and the front of her shirt. Swinging her hair side to side in a sensuous fashion, Zoey enjoyed every second. "What's your name?" "What do you care?" Zoey sassily answered before pressing her lips against the dark-haired boy's. Smoke drenched the air as Zoey, Vince, Donny, and about five other boys blew pot out of their lungs. Then, they all burst into laughter. Lights flashed violently; the stars raced by; blood ran ice cold through their veins; breath turned so heavy it caused steam to form in the air. Wind blew; sounds faded; Zoey knelt down by the bushes, vomiting until her throat went numb. Before she knew it, she was laying on her back, choking on her own bile. "Zoey!" a familiar-sounding voice called._

Victoria knocked on that horrid, rust-laced door, feeling her heart tremble. Her system was sick and slimy; her mind was spinning. Maybe it was her organs craving more pills; maybe it was the shear terror for what she knew was about to happen. "Hello, Tori," Daniel greeted her with a smile. This was horror. "Come on, we don't want to be late." As Victoria took the man's hand, her pitch black nails glistened in the haunting, flickering fluorescent lights. Her palms started to sweat, and swallowing and even breathing became difficult and painful. Soon, the two entered a dark club in an alley in the center of the city. Only dim, blue neons illuminated the room. Five men were pressing two women against a wall, kissing them violently. Tori's jaw dropped at the hideous sight, her dark lipstick glistening on her pale, sexual-Gothic face. "Here they are," Daniel said, happily as he held his hand out to four men in their late twenties and early thirties.

"Wow," one of the men said, his voice chilling. Victoria swallowed a deep, painful lump in her throat, steadied her breath, and held back frightened tears as the man took her hand, and walked her to a black room in the back. "Don't worry," she could hear Daniel say, his voice almost in a whisper.

Sam tried to keep her hands steady as she drove down the highway, looking side to side every so often. Carly clenched her arm, feeling a deep burning and a relentless throbbing that made her want to vomit. She moaned, and looked at the car floor.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Freddie asked, growing impatient.

"I will be when we finally get there," Carly snapped, her face tightening into a scowl. "Where are we even going, anyway?"

"There's a big trading group in L.A.," Sam answered, not taking her eyes off the road. "Just by PCA boarding school. Just hang on."

Tori pressed her hands on the upper back of the man laying on top of her, kissing her on the neck. _This is horrible, _she thought.

Feeling sweat trickle down her burning forehead, the brunette looked forward through half-shut eyes. "Turn the air up, please," Carly asked.

"Are you okay?" Sam asked, sounding somewhat disturbed.

"I want my freakin' pills," Carly shot back, trying not to grit her teeth. "Just hurry up, okay?"

Pressing down a little harder on the gas pedal, Sam kept trying to steady herself while proceeding down a long, crowded street. In the back seat, Freddie felt his body tense up, almost to the point of pain. Finally, the group reached Los Angeles. Not knowing how many hours or days had passed, the three walked out, and looked around.

"Fred," Sam called. "Watch the car. Me n' Carly are gonna scout out some pushes." With that, the blond and her friend walked away.

Gazing into the night's sky, Freddie noticed a nearby school, which, he figured, was PCA. It was nice; surely home to those driven to excel. "Excue me," someone greeted, breaking the boy's concentration. Somewhat shocked, Freddie turned around to see a beautiful Puerto Rican girl with long, shining dark brown hair and glittery makeup.

"Oh, um, hi," Freddie greeted, somewhat taken back. The boy could feel his heart pound and sweat form on his forehead.

"My car just broke down," Lola continued, sounding somewhat shy. "Could help me start it up, please?"

"Um, sure," Freddie answered, walking towards a nearby car. "You go to school here?"

"Yeah," the girl answered, trying to cover her leather suit under her coat. "I'm gonna be graduating soon, though."

"Cool," the teenage brunette replied, opening the hood of the car. "If you don't mind, what were you doing? It's pretty late."

"I really don't wanna talk about it," Lola answered, growing uneasy. "Can you see what's wrong it?"

"No," Freddie answered, looking around the machinery. "I can't really tell. Um, if you need a ride back..." The underage teenager motioned towards Pam's car.

"Oh," the girl nervously responded. "Oh, that's fine. I can get there from here."

"You sure?" Freddie asked, somewhat hurt and embarrassed.

"...No," Lola answered with a heavy sigh. "Look, I've had a horrible...Everything's going to hell. I just feel alone."

"Is there anything I can do to help?" the boy asked, feeling sympathy.

"...I'd love that ride home," Lola gave in, feeling cold.

"There thing," Freddie said with a smile. "My name's Freddie by the way."

"Lola," the dark-haired girl answered as she followed the boy to the car. "Thanks for this."

"Sure thing," Freddie replied with a smile.

Sam looked around, impatiently awaiting the man to enter the alley. The air was cold, and hearts were racing. "He's not coming," Carly said with a hushed voice. The brunette was growing nervous, expecting a police officer around every corner.

"Just hang on," Sam replied. "Look, someone's coming," the girl's voice turned to a whisper as a young man with dark skin and light blond hair walked into the alley.

"You girls lookin' for some goodies?" the young man asked, sounding optimistic.

"You know it," Sam answered, pulling out a handful of dollar bills. "What you got?"

"Two viles of Crystal Ice," the boy answered, pulling out a paper bag. "Some cold Meth, two tubes of Love Bug. How hard you play?"

"We play for keeps," Sam answered, taking two viles of Meth. "Here's your cash." The blond handed the man some money, then walked off with Carly. _The two poured a handful of white dust into their palms, jammed straws up their noses, then into the powder, and snorted back with all their strength; Carly gasped; Their pupils dilated; Sam dropped her things on the floor, and fell against the wall."Oh man, I don't feel so good," the blond said, her words slurred. "Why? What's wrong?" Carly asked, feeling concerned. Sam threw up in the bushes, feeling her body turn completely weak._

"You wanna come inside for a minute?" Lola asked, opening the door for the boy she felt so comfortable and respected with.

"Um, okay," Freddie answered. The two entered Lola's empty dorm room.

"Thanks for...being so nice to me," Lola said, turning around by a window. "Do you want anything? I really don't have any money."

"Um," Freddie replied, his heart pounding viciously. "Do...do you have a boyfriend or anything?"

Lola shook her head, then got the idea; dropping her coat, the teenager revealed the sexy leather suit she had on that left her hips and all but the center of her stomach exposed and revealed all of her long, thin legs.

"Whoa," the brunette boy remarked, feeling his heart start to float. However, something didn't feel right; it didn't feel the same way as the first time with Sam did. "Um, you have anything to drink?"

"Anything in the mini-fridge," Lola answered, slowly walking over to her bed. "Help yourself." _Even though she was a virgin by choice, Lola was only interested in having sex for what she believed would be feeling another's love for her._

"My head's pounding!" Sam screamed, tightening her eyes until they throbbed, clenching her teeth to the point of cracking.

"What's wrong with me?" Carly hollered, her voice so high-pitched. Terror and agony bled into every inch of the girl's bodies and minds.

_She had to know this would happen, _Sam thought, glaring at Carly for a second through blurry eyes. Rage burned into her heart. _The world started quaking, shattering their skulls and brains with violent intensity; colors bled and sounded like screams; winds flashed in front of them; smells hurt their bodies "Make it stop, make it stop!" Carly screamed, feeling her throat start to grow raw. "Get away from me!" Sam yelled, running into the street. Red and blue lights flashed, and produced a horrifying noise that smelled like closure. _Sam stood still, unable to move or get out of this horrible situation.

Opening the fridge, Freddie quickly grabbed a can of beer, ripped off the tab, and bottomed it; something had to make this better; sex wasn't supposed to lose its specialness. "Ready!" the boy nervously cried out, glancing at his girl laying on the bed. The two pressed their lips together hard, and held each other. Then, they fell down on the bed, not stopping their embrace. _In a flash, it was over; nothing. Freddie grabbed one can after another, drink after drink, no matter how much it hurt; "Oh, man," he moaned. "What's wrong?" Lola asked, sounding concerned. The boy passed out on the floor, hitting his head hard._

"No!" Zoey screamed, realizing she was two hours late for her interview. Running into the office, she soon saw she was all alone. That was it; one night; all it took was one night to destroy her future. "Now where do I go?" _Foreclosure. Cheap housing._

Quinn stood behind a podium, looking at the students sitting before her. _She'd snuffed back hard; injected two needles into her shoulders; felt her eyes sharpen; her pupils dilated; every hair on her body stood on end; her blood ran cold. _"So, as we move on," she began, trying to make sure her voice was audible to all. "Let us...um,...excuse me...oh...Oh, what am I even doing? Ah!" _The teenager thrust her fist into a wall, feeling her anger well up into oblivion. Why did everything end up with failure? Why didn't anything last? People gasped and yelled, horrified by the girl._

Jade lay in a bed in the hospital. Her eyes were closed, her breath almost silent. Crying, trying to keep quiet, the girl's mother and father watched in pain as their daughter was fed through a plastic tube shoved down her pale throat. Jade's legs were to her chest, her arms shielding her face. She was still; her skin wrinkled, her hair coarse and darker than ever. Suzeanne took in a deep, high-pitched gasp, and hid her eyes behind her hands. The sterile, white hospital gown covered a starved teenage girl's body; a teenage girl who lived her life, had friends, and dreamed of being famous. _"Hey, baby," Beck greeted his girlfriend, putting his arm around her. "Hey, hottie," Jade happily replied, kissing Beck on his lightly-scruffy cheek. Cat looked at the two, imagining how magical they felt. "You guys are the best," the redhead said, her voice warm. "We're still on for tonight?" "You know it," Jade happily answered, smiling with all her might._ With a smile on her desperate face, Jade fell deeper into herself as the liquid was pushed into her stomach.

It was so cold, so empty, so dark, so different. There was no happiness in a place like this. No one could hear her cries, see her pain. "No!" she might have screamed. Alone in the asylum, the girl rolled onto the left side of her sterile blue bed, pulled her legs up to her chest, brought her arms up by her face, and desperately searched for comfort, feeling a bulging, burning lump well up in her throat. She was now all alone. Anything good was gone, nothing more than a memory. _Carly, Sam, Freddie, and Spencer sat on the couch and chairs, throwing a brightly-colored beach ball in the air, trying to not let it hit the floor. "Almost, oh!" Sam cried, letting others join her in her last remark. "Ah, you dropped it," Freddie said between happy laughs. "Ah, I'll get it next time," Carly said with a smile on her innocent, pure face. Spencer lightly put his arm around her shoulder, and kissed her soft cheek. "Okay, let's start again," the brunette girl happily suggested, throwing the ball into the air._

Tori lay in her hospital bed; too shocked from all the men who assaulted her; too weak from all the drugs she jealously hoarded within herself. Her long, once-beautiful hair was scattered among the sheets and the pillow supporting her naked, wrinkled face. _"Cuz I still...feel dreams in my heart," she sang, proud and inspired before thousands of screaming, dedicated fans. Clad in a baggy pink top and black cargoes, she knew they loved her for her intelligence and talent. What else could she ever want? "I never gave them awayyyy..." Her voice trailed off into the breeze._ The girl's legs pressed tightly into her chest, her arms surrounding her face.

Sam lay on the floor, shielding her face from the thousands of blows; curled into a ball, trying to block the kicks and jabs to her stomach. They spat, cussed, and wouldn't stop beating her. Iron bars surrounded everyone, locking them in this dark nightmare. All she wanted was escape... _Sam sat next to her loving husband on the couch, feeling loved; so pure, so right. "I love you," she whispered. "I love you," Freddie replied, smiling as he leaned in to hold his beloved._ A tear formed in Sam's closed eye, then slid down her face, which was wearing a defeated smile. Feet and fists tore into her weak body every minute, but none of that existed right now.

Laying on the cold, hard, unfurnished, rotting wood floor, Zoey rolled her legs up to her chest, and put her arms in front of her face to block out the cold, the pain, the regret. Dana lay still next to her, her face pressed into the ground. Feeling a tear form in her eye, Zoey remembered how much hope she'd had for that interview. _Walking up to PCA, moving up those tall stairs, the blond held her young brother's hand, then looked to see Nicole, Dana, and Quinn by her sides, smiling and making their way behind her. "I'm really excited," Nicole declared, her voice upbeat and positive as always. "Me too," Zoey replied, looking at the beautiful school on that warm mid-summer's day._

Dana pulled her legs up, then moved up her arms, locked in misery and desperately seeking relief. Everything was horrid. _The shining-haired girl thrust her weight forward, looking at the crimson sky surrounding her and her friend. The landscape was clouded in shadow, making the sky all the more beautiful. "Too bad it wasn't like this freshman year," Nicole jokingly said. "Yeah," Dana called back, taking a drink of water as she rested. "Too bad."_

Quinn lay against a cold brick wall in an alley. Obscene graffiti coated everything. Those who dropped out, gave up, and didn't care sat next to her, not knowing what was coming next. Letting a tear stream down her cheek, Quinn rolled her legs up against her chest, fell on her side, and shielded her face, trying to fade. _Logan's hands were so warm and strong on her back as the two danced that night. The school's gym had been gorgeously decorated for the prom. Zoey, Lola, Chase, and Dana watched the two, feeling so happy for how everything had worked out. "I'm so glad I'm here," Quinn confessed, her head gently resting in Logan's chest. The music played on with gentle intensity, making them all wish this could last for eternity._

"Come on, open wide," Matilda gently eased her son on, holding a dull silver spoon up to his mouth. Trying to hold back tears of pain and shame and sorrow for what could have been, the woman put the semi-liquefied food into her son's mouth, just like when he was a helpless infant; not that he was much different now. "Here we go," she said, feeling her throat start to throb. Freddie sat still, barely able to do anything else. _Sam and Carly motioned towards the screen as it moved in closer. "Hi," greeted a sweet-looking girl with darker skin and long black hair. "Welcome to iCarly," the brunette happily greeted the guest. "What question do you wanna ask us?" "Um, could I talk to Freddie?" the girl humbly asked. "I go the same school as you guys, and I've been wanting to talk to him." "Looks like he has the hots for you," Sam jokingly told the boy. "Hi," Freddie greeted the girl. "Hi, Freddie," the girl replied, smiling with a wide smile. "Hey, um, do you wanna hang out some time?" "Should I go for it?" Freddie whispered to Carly out of the view of the camera. "Sure," Carly excitedly whispered back. "You'll have a great time." "Okay," Freddie answered, feeling his heart float. "When do you wanna meet?" The young girl smiled and giggled, as did Freddie, much to Sam's mocking pleasure. _Freddie smiled, his eyes closed and staring into nothingness.

Beck clenched his knees, rocking himself back and forth. "It's not a mystery," he mumbled. "It's not a mystery. It's not solved." Hot, boiling tears welled up in the teenager's eyes.

Laying on the floor in the only place she could go, Lola remained in a fetal position, trying not to cry. It was so cold. _"Good show, tonight, Lola," the director happily informed the young actress. "Thanks," the girl replied, walking backstage. Zoey, Quinn, and Dana stood behind the red velvet curtains, all smiling supportively for their friend. "Great job, Lola!" Zoey excitedly congratulated her friend. "Thanks," Lola shot back, giving Zoey a hug. "Amazing," Quinn said, her tone as innocent as ever. "Thank you..." Lola said, looking up at those bright lights. "Thank you so much..." _A remorseful tear slid down the girl's cheek, going unnoticed by anyone. It was so alone here.

Spencer lay in his bed, knowing he was all alone, and curled his knees up to his chest, his arms out in front of his face. With closed eyes, he tried so hard to shut out the world. _"You're the best, bro," Carly happily told her older brother. "No, you are," Spencer happily replied, looking at his loving, proud parents. Behind the Shays, Spencer's large, beautiful painting lit up the room. "I love you," the boy whispered, kissing his sister on the crown of her head. It felt so good to be together, to be loved; to be a caring family, just like it always was._ Spencer's breath trembled.

Taking one final bow on the stage, Katrina took in the roars of dedicated applause and cheers. Dull-red lights shined down on the beautiful wooden-styled stage, and the gigantic curtains prepared to close after a breath-taking performance. Katrina's dreamy eyes glanced up to the clapping audience, and let a smile form on her face. _This is amazing, _she thought. _Everything I've ever wanted. If only Tori was here. _A tear almost fell on her rose-colored and lightly glittered cheeks. "Trina! Trina! Trina!" the people cheered, warming the girl's heart.


End file.
